Having Hope (Ashland Pride Book 11) Read online

  This was the end of her life.

  She wanted to tell her mates that she wasn’t sorry for what happened. She’d gladly give herself for any of them.

  But she did wish she’d been able to say goodbye. To hug and kiss them once more.

  Her toes grew cold; the feeling slowly moved up her legs, and enveloped her hips. Something twinged in her belly, a strange but wonderful feeling that she couldn’t explain, and then the coldness swept up her torso and blanketed her completely. She felt like she was covered in water, but she wasn’t panicked about drowning. She could only assume that this was part of what death was like. At some point she expected to see a white light, perhaps, or angels. Maybe some of her relatives who’d gone into the great beyond before her. As her mind roamed in the vast nothingness of wherever she was, she thought about her parents. Honor, who’d come for her after the curse was broken, and did everything in her power to make up for their years apart, even though she wasn’t responsible for her behavior under the curse. Jax and Holden, who loved her as if she was their own born daughter. And sweet little Faith, the best sister on the planet, who never got tired of watching a cartoon about ponies or telling the same jokes over and over.

  Regret filled her. And hopelessness.

  The chilled feeling changed suddenly, from mildly uncomfortable to downright frigid; she felt water filling her mouth and throat and seeping into every pore.

  With a panicked scream, she struggled, her palms slapping onto the surface of the water as she burst through and took a deep, gasping breath. Choking and coughing, she felt strong hands grip her upper arms and hold her upright as she wiped water from her eyes.

  Blinking rapidly against a bright light, she found herself in a sparkling pool of water surrounded by marble columns, being held by the goddess.

  “What the hell?” Hope asked, coughing again to clear the remaining water from her lungs. “Where am I?”

  Hrixalda slowly released her hold on Hope’s arms once she seemed certain she could stand on her own. “I brought you to my home in the Ohrituary Realm.”

  “Why?” Hope looked around slowly at the magnificent landscape, dotted with snow-capped mountains, ornate stone buildings, and giant statues of people wearing togas. The pool of water was the clearest blue, like a cloud-free summer sky. The surface glittered like crystal and smelled like fresh rain.

  “Because you were dying. What do you remember?” Hrixalda emerged from the pool using a set of wide steps carved into the stone, and waved a hand over her long white gown, drying it instantly.

  Hope followed slowly. When she was free of the water, Hrixalda dried her clothes as well. She was dressed similarly, in a toga-style gown made of soft white fabric, gathered at both shoulders and tied around the waist by a braided gold belt.

  “I remember my cat warning me that something bad was coming our way and Nathan was in danger. I tackled him and felt a sharp pain, and then nothing.” She patted her arm where the pain had been, and pulled aside the gown to see unmarked skin. “You brought me here to heal me? Or am I dead?”

  Hrixalda gestured to a cushioned lounge and Hope sat with her. “The fae and your mates brought you to a healer who used an antidote for the korshern toxin. It would have worked, except for the condition you’re currently in.”

  “Condition?”

  The goddess hummed. “Did you know that I created female mountain lions to be particularly protective of their offspring?”

  “No.” She held back from saying something snarky about the curse, which had robbed the females of their affection toward their children.

  “I can tell you’re thinking about the curse. First, let me apologize for everything you went through to get to me, and for my behavior. It was pointed out to me that I overreacted originally, and then held future generations accountable for the deeds of their ancestors. You never should have had to come to me like that in the first place.”

  “You didn’t know that the curse had taken the knowledge of itself away from the lions?”

  She shook her head. “I had no idea. But to be honest, I was so heartbroken that the females had tried to kill me that I just stayed away.” With a sigh, she gazed out over the sparkling water for a long moment. Then she gave Hope a sad smile. “I cursed the lions to teach them a lesson, but I didn’t realize that I’d condemned them to a life apart from each other. I re-read the spell after I brought you back here to heal and realized what happened. When I cast the curse, I assumed the males would have no trouble breaking the spell with the females who were their truemates. What I didn’t realize was how the spell would alter the females and turn them fully away from the males. I’d essentially made it so the males would have to force the females to share blood to break the spell.”

  Hrixalda rubbed her temples with a groan. “The lives I ruined... I can’t tell you how much I hate what I did. I went to the temple while you were healing and looked at the past to see what happened to the lions after the curse. Now I’m fully aware of what I did to your people, and I’m sorry. I’m grateful you cast the spell to call me, and although I acted poorly at first, I’m hoping I can make amends.”

  Hope’s brows rose. “You’ll lift the curse?”

  “I will. I have a favor to ask first.”

  “Okay.”

  “I’d like to spend time with your pride. In your realm.”

  “You would?”

  She nodded. “A week, I think. Then I’ll break the curse.”

  “Why?”

  “So I can spend time with my favorite shifters again. I used to do that, you know. I lived in your realm with the lions, and although I think all that time spent together is what led to the females being jealous in the first place, I miss the camaraderie.”

  “I’m sure the pride would be happy to meet you and let you hang out.”

  “Back to the issue at hand,” Hrixalda said, tucking a lock of sunshine-blonde hair behind her ear.

  “What issue? My near-death?”

  “Yes. And why the antidote didn’t work on you. I don’t think the healer realized it, but the antidote is actually fatal to shifter babies.”

  Hope frowned. “I’m not a baby.”

  The goddess smiled and said nothing, but dropped her gaze to Hope’s midsection.

  Understanding dawned on Hope and she pressed her hand to her belly. “I’m pregnant?”

  “Indeed. With twins. You’re a month along. Your cat protected your babies against the antidote, even though it meant you were going to die.”

  Tears stung Hope’s eyes and she thought about her cat, who purred in response. Babies? Two babies?

  She couldn’t wait to tell her mates. And the pride.

  “Ready to go talk to your mates?” Hrixalda asked, rising to her feet.

  “How long have I been gone? They must be so worried.”

  “I can take you back to just after I took you away from them, so it won’t seem like any time has passed.”

  Hope hummed. “That’s pretty cool. It’s too bad you can’t go back and uncurse the females. But I just realized that if you did, it would alter the course of my people in ways we can’t even fathom. Like I might never have been born.”

  “Unfortunately that’s true. I can only undo the curse, not its past effects.”

  “The females will be so confused.”

  “I’ll fix that, too. And the pain that accompanies their returning memories. Don’t worry about the females, they’re in good hands.”

  Hope looked at the goddess. “The females are pretty much blonde-haired and blue-eyed. Did you do that because you have those features?”

  Hrixalda chuckled. “Yeah. Pretty conceited, huh?”

  She shrugged with a smile. “If I was a goddess, I might do the same thing. Are mountain lions really your favorite?”

  “Yes. When I was little, my mother had a menagerie of big cats. African lions are majestic, tigers are regal, panthers are sleek. But the mountain lions she had were so loving and sweet. There was thi
s old female named Juno and she was the matriarch. If any of the other cats came sniffing around her offspring, she’d chase them off. No one messed with her, even though she wasn’t the biggest one. Even the males steered clear. When I decided to meld humans and animals together, the mountain lions were the ones closest to my heart.” She frowned, her eyes getting a faraway look for a moment before she shook her head and gave Hope a crooked smile. “Until they tried to have me killed, of course. All these years, though, I never stopped loving them; but it just hurt too much. I didn’t want to face the lions because I didn’t know if they’d still hate me. It was cowardly. I mourn the time I lost with them, and also the destruction from the curse.”

  “If anything, mountain lions are forgiving. Even with the curse, the males still never gave up hoping that the females might one day change and want to be with them.”

  “They’re sweet,” she said. “And your males are quite protective of you.”

  “I’m very lucky.”

  The goddess lifted her hand and smiled at Hope. “Ready, sweet cat?”

  “Absolutely.”

  A portal opened, slicing into the air like a knife and parting it, revealing the interior of a home that Hope didn’t recognize. She saw her mates sitting on a bed, their heads bowed and shoulders hunched, the scent of tears heavy in the air. Owen had his arm around Ben, offering him comfort, and Nathan was cracking his knuckles. She stepped through the portal and into the room, and her mates’ heads snapped up at the same time, their eyes wide and their mouths parted.

  For a heartbeat, no one said anything. Then they rushed her, sweeping her away in their arms and tucking her into the far corner of the room. Their voices overlapped with excitement and curiosity as they hugged and kissed her, asking if she was okay and what had happened.

  “I’m so pissed at you,” Nathan said, wiping tears from his cheeks. “I’m the one that’s supposed to protect you, not the other way around.”

  “Can’t help it. I’ll always try to protect you guys if I can,” she said.

  Nathan swiped his thumbs over her cheeks and brushed the tears away. “I love you, Hope. Thank you for saving my life. But don’t ever fucking do that again.”

  “I’m not making any promises,” she said. She chuckled when all three of her mates snarled, their upper lips curling and their eyes flashing to the amber of their cats. “How about we just do our best to not be in danger? And never come into the fae realm again.”

  “Definitely,” Ben said.

  Hrixalda cleared her throat. Hope peeked around her mates and smiled. “Our goddess wants to say something.”

  Her mates turned to face Hrixalda, and Hope snuggled in between Nathan and Ben, their arms around her possessively and the low, humming snarl of their cats making their chests vibrate.

  The goddess smiled sadly and apologized, explaining that she hadn’t realized the damage the curse had inflicted until her brother had told her what an ass she’d made of herself. “I hope you’ll accept my apology. You should never have needed to come to the fae realm to break the curse in the first place. I should have simply punished those at fault, instead of dooming the entire race of mountain lion shifters.”

  “I forgave her,” Hope said. “And not just because she saved my life. You should, too.”

  Nathan looked down at her and then at the goddess. “Without the curse, who knows if any of us would have been born or where we’d be. While I hate what was done to our people, I’m thankful for Hope, and for you saving her life. So I forgive you. And I thank you from the bottom of my heart.”

  Owen nodded. “You brought her back to us. You’re golden in my book.”

  “Me too,” Ben said. “What’s going to happen now?”

  “I’m going to break the curse,” Hrixalda said. “In a week.”

  “Why a week?” Ben asked, his brow furrowing.

  “She wants to come to our realm and spend time with the pride. Then she’ll break the curse and go to the females and tell them what’s going on, so they’re not left floundering and in pain from the return of their memories.”

  Owen hummed. “I’m sure the pride won’t mind you coming to stay, especially if you’re going to break the curse.”

  “Good,” Hrixalda said. “Thank you for forgiving me.”

  “Thanks for saving our sweetheart,” Owen said.

  “Do you need to pack?” Ben asked. “We’d like to get home to our realm.”

  She stepped into the still-open portal and returned with two bags. Closing the gap behind her, she declared herself ready. After speaking for a short while with the healer, she opened a portal into their realm and walked through with Crimson, Jenna, and the rest. Hope stayed with her mates in the healer’s room.

  “There’s a reason that the antidote didn’t work,” she said.

  “Fenton thought it was because you’re not from this realm,” Owen said.

  “It’s not that. My cat somehow stopped the antidote from working because she was protecting something inside me.”

  “What?” Ben asked.

  “I’m pregnant.”

  Her mates stared at her in silence. Their eyes grew wide as they dropped their gazes to her midsection, and she giggled and hugged them. “Come on, be happy! It’s amazing news!”

  They whooped and cheered, each one kissing her sweetly and deeply, their cats purring in their chests and their eyes alight with happiness. “How long?” Ben asked, resting his hand on her belly.

  “Just a month,” she said. She pulled Owen and Nathan’s hands to her stomach and covered them with her own. “And not just one baby, but two!”

  “Twins? Are you serious?” Owen asked, his brows high.

  “Very. Hrixalda told me. It’s why the antidote didn’t work. It would have killed the babies, and my cat protected them by fighting off the effects of it.”

  “Even though you were dying?” Nathan asked.

  “Yeah, crazy huh? Hrixalda said that she created females to be super protective of their offspring. My cat nearly killed me trying to keep the babies alive. It’s a hell of a catch-22.”

  Owen’s fingers flexed on her stomach. “It’s amazing, sweetheart. We’re so happy.”

  “Me too,” she said. “Oh my gosh, we’re going to have two babies in the house in eight months!”

  Ben gave her the sweetest smile, his eyes dancing with happiness. “We can’t wait.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  When the portal opened into Callie’s backyard, Ben was relieved to be home, and he knew everyone with them was, too. Treasure was sitting on the porch asleep, her head propped up on her hand. She sat up with a start and shouted for Callie as she raced to them, grabbing Hope in a hug.

  “I had the most terrible dream!” Treasure said, her words growing thick with emotion as her blue eyes glittered with tears. “I dreamed you were in pain and died. I saw white light and people in white robes.”

  Hope hugged Treasure and glanced at her mates. “I’m okay now. Let me thank everyone who came to help first, and then I’ll tell you everything.”

  Treasure released her hold on Hope and nodded.

  Hope turned to face the Kentucky pack members who’d come to their aid, and Ben and his brothers joined her. They shook hands and offered their heartfelt thanks.

  “We were happy to help,” Jason said. “We’re very glad things turned out the way they did for your people, and especially your family.”

  Ben grinned. His mate was pregnant with twins. No news had ever been so happily accepted by him as this, outside of her successfully overcoming the venom that had almost claimed her.

  While they were in the fae realm, Jenna had come back to update Callie, Treasure, and the pride. Ben knew it had killed Treasure to know she couldn’t be with Hope when everyone thought she was dying. A hard shudder rocked him at the thought of living without his sweetheart, but he pushed the bad thought away and focused on their future. She was safe and secure with them, and that was what mattered.

&n
bsp; “We wanted you to meet someone,” Hope said, clasping her hands together. She turned toward the still-open portal and called for the goddess to join them.

  Hrixalda peered around the edge of the portal with a wary yet hopeful look, and then stepped out, straightening her spine and closing the portal behind her. “Hello.”

  Treasure sucked in a sharp breath. “It’s you!”

  “Yes?” Hrixalda said with a frown.

  “I’m the one who found out about you from my father’s journals.” Treasure walked to the goddess and took her hand. A glow formed around their joined hands, at first white but slowly turning pink and morphing to blue.

  “Holy hells bells,” Hrixalda said with a chuckle. “You’re a dragonfae. I had no idea any of you were still around.”

  “I think I’m the only one. My parents hid me from the fae and died protecting me.”

  Hrixalda nodded. “Hope told me about her friend who wasn’t allowed in the fae realm any longer. She didn’t say you were a myth come to life, though. Your parents did a marvelous job of keeping your nature a secret, but I’m sorry to hear they died.”

  Treasure nodded. “Thank you for saving my bestie.”

  “What’s a bestie?”

  “Best friend,” Hope supplied. She joined them, putting her arm around Treasure’s shoulders. “Without her, I wouldn’t know my mates.”

  “So you’re setting the females free from the curse?” Callie asked from the porch, where she was snuggled in between Ethan and Eryx.

  “I will,” the goddess said. “But first I’m going to spend time with the mountain lions.”

  Owen looked up from his cell phone, which he’d left on Callie’s porch and said, “I just texted James and he’s getting the leaders of the pride together to discuss things. They’ll let us know.”

  “Of course,” Hrixalda said.

  Cadence, who was standing with Jason on the porch, said, “We should get home. It’s been a long and stressful wait.”

  The pack members congratulated the quartet on coming back alive and in one piece, and Ben and his brothers thanked them, with Hope offering her own heartfelt appreciation for their help. When the pack was gone, Callie invited them inside for breakfast while they waited to hear from the pride. By the time they’d finished introducing Hrixalda to yogurt-and-fruit parfaits, eggs benedict, and mango smoothies, the pride was gathered at the boarding house and waiting for them to arrive.