Having Hope (Ashland Pride Book 11) Read online

  Ben took her hand and brought it to his lips. “She’s so cold.”

  “It’s the venom,” Crimson said. He opened a wooden cabinet and pulled out a blanket, handing it to Ben, who laid it across her.

  “I don’t understand what happened,” Nathan said. He turned to face Crimson. “Was the trail where that thing lived?”

  He shook his head, folding his arms across his head. “I haven’t seen one of them in years. Generally they stay away from people, but it attacked seemingly without warning.”

  “If Hope hadn’t tackled me, I’d be the one poisoned, not her. That’s what should have happened.” While he loved that she’d protected him, he was furious that she’d gotten hurt in the process.

  “She’s a special female,” Crimson said. “I can’t imagine why it tried to attack you in the first place, or why it was there.”

  Fenton turned with a bowl in his hands and walked swiftly to the bedside. “Oh, I can.”

  “You can?” Owen asked.

  He hummed, taking a handful of sour-smelling purple paste and smearing it on Hope’s arm. “All of you smell like lais leaves.”

  Nathan thought the word sounded familiar but couldn’t figure out from where, until Ben recognized it as an ingredient in the spell to call the goddess.

  “Ah,” Fenton said. He continued to spread the paste over Hope’s arm and shoulder, following the trail of blue lines across her skin. Her complexion was pale and ashy, her eyelids closed and her lips parted. He could hear her heart beating and see the shallow rise and fall of her chest as she breathed.

  When the paste was entirely spread over one quarter of her body, the healer set the bowl in a sink and poured some water to wash his hands. “Lais leaves are an aphrodisiac to the korshern. When a female’s in heat, she rolls around in them and the males come running. I suspect the male who attacked scented it on you and assumed you were a female ready to have fun.”

  “It couldn’t tell I wasn’t one of its own kind?” Nathan asked, dumbfounded.

  Fenton shrugged. “Their eyesight isn’t that good. They start off the mating with a bite. They’re not venomous to each other.”

  Nathan put his hand on Hope’s forehead. “Thank you for saving my life, baby, but damn it I wish you hadn’t gotten bitten.”

  “When is that smelly stuff supposed to start working?” Ben asked.

  “It should be working already,” Fenton said, turning from the sink with a frown.

  “It’s getting worse,” Ben said. He pointed to the new blue lines that were appearing around the areas of paste.

  Crimson straightened from where he was leaning against the wall. “That’s not good.”

  “No,” Fenton said, picking up a small towel and wiping some of the paste away. Underneath, her skin was just as marked up with the lines as before. “She should be on the way to healing. The antidote always works.”

  “Why isn’t it?” Nathan demanded, his cat yowling anxiously in his mind.

  “I don’t know,” Fenton said. “Let me make a stronger batch.”

  Nathan used a towel and bowl of water to clean the paste from Hope’s skin. He and his brothers were silent as worry plagued them. Fenton applied another batch of paste that smelled even worse. The minutes ticked by. Hope’s complexion paled more, her skin grew so cold it felt like ice, and the blue lines continued to creep farther.

  “I don’t understand,” Fenton said. He looked at Crimson, and something unspoken passed between them. Nathan knew without words that the outcome of Hope’s healing wasn’t looking good.

  “No,” Nathan said, his knuckles cracking as he clenched his fists. “Tell me you can do something!”

  “I’m sorry,” Fenton said. “I’m so sorry. The antidote has never failed, and I don’t know what to make of it.”

  “Do something else,” Owen said. “There must be another cure.”

  Crimson joined Fenton and looked down at Hope. “He’s the best healer in the glen. The antidote should have worked, but it’s not stopping the venom from going through her system. There’s no reason I can think of that it wouldn’t work, except that she’s a shifter and not of our realm.”

  “We’ll go home and take her to a hospital,” Ben said, his words laced with panic and his eyes glittering with tears.

  Reality swamped Nathan as the fae healer gravely shook his head. “I’m terribly sorry, but there isn’t anything that can be done for her. The doctors in your realm wouldn’t even know what the creature is or how to counteract the poison. Something is causing Hope to reject the antidote, and I can’t imagine what it could be. There’s no other antidote to try, or any other way to remove the poison from her system. I’m afraid she’s dying.”

  Ben’s voice cracked. “No. It’s not possible.”

  Nathan lifted his blurry gaze to the healer. “Is she in pain?”

  “No,” he said. “The toxin numbs first. Her body is shutting down, but she’s not aware of it.”

  “Can she hear us?” Owen asked, his voice raw.

  “I don’t know, but you can talk to her. You have maybe an hour. We’ll leave you alone to say goodbye.”

  Crimson put his hand on Nathan’s shoulder. “I’m sorry that I failed to protect your mate. I brought you here, and your safety was my responsibility.”

  “She pushed me out of harm’s way,” Nathan said, turning his attention to Hope. “If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine. I’d rather die than have her take my place.”

  “We’ll be outside,” Crimson said.

  When Nathan and his brothers were alone, they stood in silence, each of them touching Hope’s cold skin and listening to her shallow breathing. He couldn’t believe he’d never again see her beautiful blue eyes glittering with humor or hear the rumble of her cat’s purr in her chest. Their life together had just gotten started. It was monstrously unfair that it was over so soon, that she was dying because she loved Nathan enough to put herself in harm’s way for his sake.

  He leaned over and kissed her cold lips. “I don’t deserve your sacrifice, Hope, but I’ll honor it forever. Thank you for saving me.”

  He took a small step back but kept hold of her hand, allowing his brothers to speak to her softly, whispering words of affection and grief as the minutes ticked down and fate seemed intent on taking their beloved sweetheart from them.

  He’d never considered living without Hope. He didn’t want to believe this was his new reality, but he had no choice. Fate didn’t care that his heart was being torn from his body.

  He put his arms around his brothers and looked tearfully down at Hope.

  “Our lives were better for knowing her,” he said thickly. “We’ll never be the same.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Realm of Ohrituary, Land of the Ancients

  Something tickled Hrixalda’s spine; a strange feeling of urgency and dread that she couldn’t explain. She rose from the lounge in her resting chamber and walked to the balcony that overlooked the Sea of Veracity. Leaning against the stone railing, she stared at the sparkling aqua surface, which glittered in the moonlight like crushed diamonds.

  She’d tried to rest but had found herself unable to sleep, despite the luxury that surrounded her. Her insomnia was due to those infuriating mountain lion shifters. Here she’d waited eons for them to call her to restore their people to their former glory, and the first time they met face to face, the lions weren’t thrilled to see her. In fact, they practically vibrated with barely contained rage.

  While she felt thoroughly justified in telling them to take a hike with the curse intact, the meeting had left her feeling hollow. She’d envisioned things being far different when her most beloved shifters called for her.

  Chewing on her thumbnail, she stared at the water’s surface, that tickling, odd feeling growing stronger.

  Fury. Hopelessness. Grief.

  So much grief.

  There was a soft knock on her door and a creak as it opened.

  “Can’t sleep?” Farr
– her brother, the god of water creatures – asked as he strode inside.

  “How did you know?” She turned to face him.

  “Because I could hear you tossing and turning, even when I tried to drown out the sound with the female in my bed.” He gave her a rakish waggle of his brows, and she made a face.

  “Don’t talk to me about your sex life, Farr, I’ll throw up.”

  He gave her an indulgent smile. “You know, my mermen don’t have a problem with me at all.”

  “And?” Irritation flowed through her veins, along with a rising urge to call a few shifters to her defense.

  “I’m just pointing out that I never had to curse my people to teach them a lesson.”

  It was a sore spot with her, even with the event in question so many centuries in the past.

  But what bothered her most was the females telling her that their people didn’t even know about the curse. How was that even possible? She’d arranged for the curse to be easily broken – the females only had to call on her and apologize. She’d waited. And waited. Eons later? She was faced with people who thought she was a terrible goddess.

  How was it possible that the black panther shifters knew about the curse, but her own people didn’t?

  Worry gnawed at her. What if it was true? What if she’d caused the destruction of her favorite shifters because the curse worked too well?

  Looking at her brother, she asked, “Why are you here, anyway?”

  “I heard a rumor about your people and wanted to see if you’d heard it as well.”

  “I haven’t heard anything.”

  “Ah.”

  After a few moments had passed, she stamped her foot at her always-dramatic brother. “Would you tell me already?”

  “Of course. The shifters who came to see you in Skyye were tracked by a male korshern. Apparently, part of the spell the lions cast had lais leaves in it, and as you know, the korshern love them.”

  “What?” The tingling in her spine...had that been a warning because one of them was injured? “What happened?”

  “One of the females pushed her mate out of harm’s way and was bitten by the korshern. The glen’s healer tried his best, but the antidote was rejected by the female. She’s in the last few minutes of her life.” He waited a moment and then cleared his throat. “I just have one question.”

  Her stomach knotted. “What?”

  “Was it worth it?” His genial attitude slipped away, revealing irritation and anger.

  “What are you talking about?”

  “You cursed numerous generations for the sins of a few jealous females – who, by the way, are long dead. Was it worth losing your favorite shifters because of your pride?”

  “They tried to kill me!”

  “Yeah, yeah. So what? Who hasn’t had an attempted murder against them by people they created and loved?” He pointed to the trident-shaped scar on his chest, evidence of an angry merman who’d come after him.

  “I didn’t know it would happen.” It was a lame response, but it was true. Though it was also true she hadn’t cared to check on them, even after all these years.

  “Face the facts. You cast a curse without worrying about the fallout. The lions had every right to be pissed. If that hurts your feelings, I’m sorry, but it is what it is.”

  “The one who’s injured – is it Hope?”

  “I don’t know. If I were you, I’d rethink your stance on making the current generation pay for the sins of the previous ones, though. You’ve been a miserable bitch for ages. It’s time to start fresh. Don’t you think?”

  “Since when are you such a bastion of grace and forgiveness?”

  “I’m not sure, actually. But I know you well enough to know that once you realized what your curse had done to them, you’d want to make amends. Right now, someone’s life is on the line. It appears that your gigantic ego is the only thing in the way of healing not only the female, but the rift between yourself and your people.”

  “Your ego is far bigger than mine,” she shot back.

  “Indeed, but I know when to take a hit to my pride for the greater good. You, dear sister, have never figured that out.”

  He spun on his heels and walked out of the room, leaving her with her thoughts. Although she hated to admit it, he was right. She’d miscalculated the curse, then figured the lions simply hadn’t reached out to apologize out of spite. That the curse had unintentionally caused them to not even know about it broke her heart. Farr was right – she needed to make things right, and she could start by helping whoever had been injured by the beast.

  And she’d lift the curse. Just as a show of good faith.

  After changing into more suitable clothing, she opened a portal into the fae realm, easily locating the mountain lions among all the fae. Then she took the first step toward reconciliation.

  Chapter Thirteen

  For the first time in his life, Owen felt helpless. Hope was dying, and they didn’t have a chance to say goodbye. Could she even hear their words? And her parents...they’d be devastated. He couldn’t even call Honor, Jax, and Holden to tell them what was happening.

  There was so much he needed to do as the leader of their family, but he was immobile. His limbs were frozen, keeping him at her bedside, his gaze was riveted to her body. His mind reeled at the thought that only two months after they met, they’d be saying goodbye because of a murderous twist of fate that would leave him and his brothers widowers.

  He closed his eyes, scrubbing at his wet cheeks with his free hand.

  Something crackled near him, and a blast of heat caused him to open his eyes.

  Standing at the foot of the bed was the goddess.

  His cat rose within him, full of rage. He bared his fangs at her with a furious hiss. “Haven’t you done enough? Get the hell out of here!”

  She stared at him, her eyes a bright blue that seemed lit from within. Raising one hand, she closed her fingers into a fist, and his claws and fangs receded against his will. He grunted with the strain of attempting to keep them out. It was as if they were being pulled back into his body, and it hurt like hell.

  “Now that that’s handled, I came to help.”

  The healer and Crimson raced into the room. “Whoa,” Crimson said. “What the hell are you doing here?”

  “Goddesses don’t come down the mountain,” Fenton said. He smoothed trembling fingers down the front of his tunic. “What can we do for you?”

  Ben sniffled and cleared his throat. “You came to help?”

  Hrixalda turned her gaze to Hope. “I did. My brother told me that one of the lions was dying.”

  Owen shook his head. “Fenton said there was nothing that could be done to help her.”

  “While I’m certain he’s an excellent healer, he’s no god.” She moved to stand on the opposite side of the bed. Ben joined Owen and Nathan across from her.

  Owen was wary. His cat was on edge because their attempt to show force had been shut down expertly by the goddess, and he felt as though he couldn’t call his claws and fangs right now if his life depended on it.

  Hrixalda put her hand on Hope’s forehead and closed her eyes. She exhaled, and a soft white glow flowed from her hand and spread over Hope’s skin like a light mist, then retreated back into the goddess’s skin.

  “I see.” Hrixalda moved gracefully to the side of the bed, bent, and lifted Hope into her arms.

  “What are you doing?” Owen asked. “What’s going on?”

  “I’ll be back.”

  Owen lunged at her, attempting to take Hope from her arms, but a portal opened behind her and she disappeared, leaving the room smelling of sunshine and rain.

  “What the actual fuck?” Nathan shouted.

  Owen rounded on Crimson and Fenton. “What happened? Did she take her back up the mountain?”

  Crimson’s eyes were bright red, and he lifted his head and sniffed the air. “Hrixalda took her into the realm of the gods. I’m sorry, but we can’t follow her. Onl
y gods and goddesses can open portals there, the same way that only fae can open portals into the fae realm.”

  Ben lifted the pillow that Hope’s head had been resting on and hugged it. “She’ll save her life and bring her back, right?”

  Crimson opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again. He sighed before he spoke. “I want to tell you yes, but I honestly have no idea how she knew to come here, or why she took Hope.”

  Owen looked at his brothers. He swallowed against the lump in his throat and attempted to put on a brave face. He was certain he failed, though. “We don’t have a choice but to wait. She said she’d be back, so we’ll trust that she will be.”

  “I don’t like it,” Nathan said, growling the words.

  “Me either,” Owen said. They walked out of the treatment room and shared the news with the pride members and the other shifters who had come to help. Melody and Jilly hugged them, offering words of hope and patience. It wasn’t as if Owen and his brothers had any choice. They were well and truly helpless; they could do nothing but wait.

  And trust in a goddess who’d cursed her people in retaliation for deeds done generations earlier.

  Attempting to remain optimistic for his brothers’ benefit, he plastered a smile on his face and settled in a comfortable chair to wait.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Hope had thought nothing of the act of pushing Nathan out of the way of the strange creature. Her actions had been instinctive, her cat had warned her something dangerous was near, and didn’t want anything to happen to any of her beloved mates. As she’d landed on top of Nathan, she’d felt something shred her arm. The pain had been immediate, and in minutes she’d drifted off, unable to see or hear or speak. She’d been drifting in this weird nothingness for a long time, feeling like she was being pulled away from her mates bit by bit.